Barbarians Compendium

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Waiting for the Barbarians Compendium

Strategies/Techniques

• “We do not discuss the reason for his being here. He is here under the emergency powers and that is enough.” First page, ominous, introduce a character/situation from the POV of person who does not want to discuss/reveal it.

• “Pain is truth; all else is subject to doubt. That is what I bear away from my conversation with Colonel Joll.” Great technique! Protagonist restates gist of interaction in an aphoristic style. Protagonist’s reinterpretation (or misinterpretation) of the interaction can shed light on his own worldview and hubris.

• “(At a certain point I begin to plead my own cause.)” Self-reflexive thoughts in parenthesis, + formal diction, gives the feeling of a hyper-analytic and distant character.  

•“‘None of us could speak their language, sir.’ Of course not! These river people are aboriginal, older even than the nomads.” Nice way to sneak in necessary information without being too expository. Reaction to dialogue in interior thought that provides information while also developing the character (in this case, impatient, knowledgeable, feels superior).

• “Then into the silence, like a pebble into a pool, I drop my question.” Nice rhythm. Try flipping the simile so that the metaphorical image precedes the reality.

• “I embrace her with gratitude, without desire.” with… without… interesting way to describe a gesture. Use sparingly because it can sound too abstract, but works well to establish nuance in an action and work against the expected way of doing something.

• “he and I have managed to behave towards each other like civilized people. All my life I have believed in civilized behavior; on this occasion, however, I cannot deny it, the memory leaves me sick with myself.” Seamless transition from present scene > broad statement about character > way in which present scene reflects change in character.

• “she dislikes fancy, questions, speculations; we are an ill-matched couple.” Speaker describes himself by describing someone else and stating how this behavior relates to his own life.

• “He surveys me with the arrogant candor of a young graduate of the War College.”

with the ____ of a _____. This short description of gesture tells us about the character as well as the societal context in which he exists. Also gives clear image of his manner.

• “(I am not stupid, let me say these things). Almost as if the reader is being addressed in the parenthetical (you, reader, let me say these things). Engages us more intimately.

 • “The key turns slowly in the lock.” First sentence of new section on page 88. Begin the scene with lots of uncertainty/possibility. Who turns the key? The guard, the prisoner, or an unknown?

Loved Phrases and Ideas

• “Space is space, life is life, everywhere the same. But as for me, sustained by the toil of others, lacking civilized vices with which to fill my leisure, I pamper my melancholy and try to find in the vacuousness of the desert a special historical poignancy. Vain, idle, misguided! How fortunate that no one sees me!” p. 16 Beautiful! Agony of the inability to be present in leisure, due to the need to find meaning and relevance in History.  

• “It would be best if this obscure chapter in the history of the world were terminated at once, if these ugly people were obliterated from the face of the earth and we swore to make a new start, to run an empire in which there would be no more injustice, no more pain.” p. 24 Utopian impulse behind fascism, and narrator seems partially unaware of the gravity of what he says.

• “I struggle with the old story, hoping that before it is finished it will reveal to me why it was that I thought it worth the trouble.” p. 24

• “The older a man the more grotesque people find his couplings, like the spasms of a dying animal.” p. 32 perfect simile to express his self-loathing, disgust.

• “But I might equally well tie her to a chair and beat her, it would be no less intimate.”  The intimacy of violence. Phrase reflects the confusion of his feelings toward her.

• “Sometimes my sex seemed to me another being entirely, a stupid animal living parasitically upon me.” Libido as a curse,  desire to view it has separate from one’s personality/being.   

• from the oppression of such freedom who would not welcome confinement? In my opposition there is nothing heroic — let me not for an instant forget that. p. 77

• “time for the black flower of civilization to bloom.” p.77 juxtaposition of the beautiful and the sinister.

• “The texture of the days, on the other hand, is as dull as porridge. Never before has my nose been so rubbed in the quotidian. p. 86 Gorgeous line. Days have a texture. The language likens him to a dog without making the comparison explicit.

• “I pronounce the words aloud, stare at them, try to grasp their significance.” p. 92.

• “it is not always easy to tell where barbarian burial sites lie. It is recommended that you simply dig at random: perhaps at the very spot where you stand you will come upon scraps, shards, reminders of the dead. Also the air: the air is full of sighs and cries.” p.110 The specter of colonial murder and war is everywhere, you cannot escape it. Beautiful rhythm, the rhyme works well at the end.

• “People are not interested in the history of the back of beyond.” p. 111 So true. Speaks to feelings of insignificance, historical irrelevance, yearning to make a mark that outlasts oneself. 'Back of beyond' rolls off the tongue beautifully.

• Is there a point at which I will lie down and say, “Kill me — I would rather die than go on”? Sometimes I think I am approaching that point, but always I am mistaken. p. 114

• “Without exception they are dreams of ends; dreams not of how to live but of how to die.”

p. 130

Words to use

spasm

scythe (as a verb, “a single scythe of the jaws.”)

murmur

specious

anchored

obdurate

New words

rime

brazier

expiation

Ideas for my story

• A good 8 pages in scene to establish the forward movement of the narrative before any backstory. Unsure of his exact role for the first 8 pages until he writes, “I am a country magistrate,” but there is enough context in the interaction with Joll to propel the story.

• S. uses short declarative diction often verging on aphorism, much like the Barbarian girl, but J. is more aware of the distinction between his thought process and hers. Admires her speaking style in interior thought.

• Don’t overuse rhetorical questions or lay the self-analysis on too thick. You want Custis to be self-aware, but not as self-aware as narrator in Barbarians, because the interior monologue is exhausting at times.

Dialogue language and techniques

• “It is not too late to put a stop to the lecture. Instead I hear my voice rise in tone and abandon myself regretfully to the intoxication of anger.” Interior thought that interrupts dialogue, reflecting on what he himself is saying. Speaking always entails simultaneous reflection on one’s speech, and revealing this reflection adds depth to dialogue.

• “Yes there were other men. I did not have a choice. That was how it had to be.” Short, direct, unquestioning declarations, in direction contrast to narrator’s probing self-analysis. Juxtaposition of diction and thought-process creates tension in conversations.

• “Bringing us out here in winter!” I imagine them saying. “We should never have agreed!” Imagined dialogue can be just as effective as dialogue in scene.